1st Mock Inspection Sample Report

[Jerry Simon]

Anyhow, being right or wrong takes care of itself. WJ

No, it doesn't. Not with Walter, anyway.

I just read some of Phillip's sample report, and noticed the part about "Mold and other contaminates...". Walter jumped on me about that word "contaminates" a couple years back after he read one of my sample reports. Claimed I was borderline illiterate and had resorted to making up words, or some such criticism.

When I *gently suggested* the "made-up" word (contaminates) was included in boilerplate written by and supplied by Mark Cramer in his inspection software, all of a sudden it was a non-issue. Walter wouldn't even acknowledge that such a mistake could be made by Cramer.

Walter picks and chooses. If Cramer, or another bossum buddy of his makes a mistake, it's surely the fault of evil fairies or gnomes. If an inspector that hasn't "earned" Walter's respect makes a mistake, they should (in his mind apparently) be doomed to forever trying to properly check-off a check-list report.

I've learned a lot from Walter...yadda, yadda, yadda. I still wanna bitch-slap him, though.

[Bain]

WJ,

I think the only thing being requested of you is to try a little more helpfulness, a little less smarminess. Everyone here already knows you're a smart guy, and a very good writer.

When one is correct while acting like an ass, people tend to focus more on the one than the other.

Let's just keep it gentlemanly, huh?

JM

Sure. I'd strongly support your leading the way with helpfulness, gentle words for a gentle readership. Everybody likes gentle.

Ironically, you're accusing me -- in a sort of backhanded passive-agressive ad-hominem and ungentlemanly kind of way -- of the polar opposite of smarminess. Smarmy is the Eddie Haskell thing. (Gee, your frock is most becoming, Mrs. Cleaver.)

In the context of an HI web board, I'm curmugdeonly, a crosspatch. Since I was about 12, I've followed a creed of eliminating the screwups first, then shining up the things that need polishing. In my bandleader role, my rule was, "First, we take out all the parts that suck."

It's not that I'm aiming to be right all the time. (Well, actually, I am aiming for that. Who isn't?) Anyhow, being right or wrong takes care of itself. When I'm right, I'm right. Clearly, I'm not right for this room.

Please have one of the non-smarmy brethren (they know who they are) let me know when the HI community is perfect, and comprises only sweet and gentle folk who tread gently on the good earth.

WJ

There's nothing wrong with being curmudgeonly, Walter. But folks who check in on this forum have divergent levels of expertise and experience. If I make some egregious error--umm, but not a typo--by all means let me have it. I'm a prick, and I can certainly take the heat.

Troy, however, who initiated this thread, is a newbie. He didn't offer up his inspection report as a work of art to be admired. Rather he said, "This is my first attempt. Please help me."

You essentially told him that the writing was so bad, he should stop wasting his time and compile checklist-style reports. That's not curmudgeonly. That's insensitive and unkind.

For the record, I enjoy your posts, and think we'd probably get along if we ever met.

'Course, maybe not until after a fistfight or two . . .

[Jerry Simon]

Anyhow, being right or wrong takes care of itself. WJ

No, it doesn't. Not with Walter, anyway.

I just read some of Phillip's sample report, and noticed the part about "Mold and other contaminates...". Walter jumped on me about that word "contaminates" a couple years back after he read one of my sample reports. Claimed I was borderline illiterate and had resorted to making up words, or some such criticism.

Could be your memory's faulty, but maybe not. It's been a looong time...

I pointed that out glaring error to a lot of people, including my good friend Charlie Wood, one of the smartest HIs I've ever met, and the guy who hired me to edit 10,000 boilerplate comments for his then-company's comment library. That whole "contaminates" thing had been inserted into the software of who-knows-how many HI reports. It had become more HI folklore. Worse, it referred to deadly toxic mold, which was all the rage at the time.

Frankly, this error (it's not a typo) made a lot of HIs look kinda foolish, since "contaminate" is a verb and "contaminant" is a noun.

You are absolutely correct that this is the kind of thing that annoys me. I'm bothered knowing that reasonably-well-educated people will think that the great mass of home inspectors need remedial education.

I don't remember bringing it up to Cramer, because, frankly, Cramer is a 99.9% right kind of guy. I don't correct 99.9% guys. They self-correct. And I like having 99.9% guys for buddies.

Truth be told, I don't think Cramer had the contaminate/contaminant error in his software, which I used for many years. I would've noticed, and I would've pointed it out to Cramer, who would've appreciated the heads-up.

Go in peace,

WJ

As always, you make some good points. Thank you for those.

None-the-less, I corrected Mark's software boilerplate after you *gently* pointed it out. Phillip might want to, as well.

(Perhaps Cramer corrupted both our software editions and not yours just to be a meanie. I wouldn't put it past him.)

[Richard Saunders]

Originally posted by SonOfSwamp

Please show one instance of me starting a post with, "in my humble opinion."

Note: I've already checked.

Yes, it appears I may have misquoted you. I went through a few back posts and only found, "In my humble 20-year experience", "IMHO", "Just my humble opinion". I only spent a few minutes because I am pretty busy, but you're probably right Walter, it never happened.

[Jim Morrison]

Thanks for the vocab review, Walter, but I wouldn't have used the word 'smarmy' if I had meant something else.

And I apologize if you think I was being passive-aggressive. I hate that. It was my attempt at being genteel.

You're a grown man and a smart man. If you don't get the message being sent to you by now, you're not going to.

I'm probably not the right messenger anyway.

[kurt]

I think it would be cool if we stopped now.......otherwise, I'm going to split the thread, and I don't know what I'd call the split portion...(?)...

I'm temporarily at a loss for new words.

[Scottpat]

I think it would be cool if we stopped now.......otherwise, I'm going to split the thread, and I don't know what I'd call the split portion...(?)...

I'm temporarily at a loss for new words.

I see no need to do anything to this thread. It is what it is and WJ is what he is. I would hate to see TIJ threads being moderated for what has taken place on this one. This thread should stand as a reminder for all and how folks should and should not be treated.

For those of us that have been around for a few years, we have seen this happen before and I'm sure it will happen again.

[kurt]

Okee dokee.......

[ghentjr]

Okee dokee.......

Thanks. Walter is Walter. I don't think he was out of line. Hard, but to the point. I think it may creep up on a person when that person reads all the other bad language that happens daily.

[dcmeagle]

I think it's great that Troy has posted his report for review and so many people gave great input. I just came across this today, but have seen him post the same report on two other message boards. He obviously wants to get as much input as possible to improve his report.